Recently there has been much talk about a study by Singapore Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSF) released on 8 December 2020 : “Children of divorced parents tend to fare worse than peers from intact families”
According to this study, people from divorced families are disadvantaged and will grow up to earn less than people in families who are not divorced, have less in CPF, less likely to have a university degree. (Source: https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/children-from-divorced-families-earn-less-and-more-likely-to-be-divorced-themselves-msf)
I would like to say that this is bull and add a perspective.
I come from an intact family, but it was not a happy one. I was lucky to have a wonderful mother, amazing siblings, but our childhood was not whole. I believe that Happy Parents leads to Happy Children. But not all intact families are Happy. A happy family could be a single family, it could be a divorced family. It is how the parents commit to their children. There is no way, 2 parents who are unhappy together can provide a happy environment for their children. Ask me.
Divorced or not, does not equate to happy families.
What if life is like the story “Journey to the West”, where we all have choices as part of our trials and tribulations. Sometimes we let the Pig in us lead, for instant gratification, sometimes the Monkey god in us, who wants a quick and effective win, to get on with the journey (life). Still not sure about Sandy’s role yet, perhaps one which I have yet to embrace.
And Tang Sanzang, the quest seeker, the answer seek who continues to pursue the answer to life. Maybe he represents the purity within us. The search about meaning of life, the search for purpose and how can we help.
It sounds easy but its not straight forward. Here are the simplified steps at a go.
CASE mainly serves the role as a 3rd party mediator. After fact finding session with you, they will draft the letter and send to the other party. And this is the part, as CASE has no legal enforcement etc., anyone can choose to not reply or ignore.
If CASE letter goes un-responded. You can than start a separate submission to Small Claims Tribunal, the process takes about an hour online and upon submission, you have to mail the letter to them via registered mail at SingPost. In our unfortunately experience, the date for hearing is 3 months away. So do not border on optimist and submit the forms directly if you do not receive any responses.
Key points to note
CASE has no legal enforcement power, so we were dissapointed with the non-response and non-outcome. CASE is optional
Small Claims Tribunal (SCT) facilitates a hearing and a judgement but does not do enforcement. For example, they ask the seller to return you the money but you have to chase the seller yourself. So if you meet a seller who doesnt care, you only have a paper award.
At our first SCT submission hearing, we had to withdraw the case as the filling can only indicate the name of the company. We had indicated the individuals in the company and was rejected. At this point, we wished someone could have told us so that we did not have to wait another 3 months for another hearing.
In total we waited 8 months for our ORDER/AWARD and the seller is not responding and pushing us around. Enforcement level is missing.
If anyone higher up reads this, please note that: 1.Enforcement is needed for SCT Order 2.Someone should read the submissions and advice if there’s error on the paperwork, reducing unnecessary time wastage both for your staff and ours.
UPDATE: Teak & Co. have moved to #08-10 (16 April 2021), ACRA addresses has also been changed.
Scammed of $5K at Tan Boon Liat Building #14-06.
Let’s talk about scams. I got scammed of $5K at Tan Boon Liat Builiding, a furniture shop called SOS, now called Collective Living and also known as Prestige Modern Space Living. They are located at 315 Outram Road, #14-06 Tan Boon Liat Building, Singapore 169074.
The next fishy part, the above company names do not exist. The payments and all are to their parent company P+ Capital Pte Ltd at 190 Middle Road #19-105 Fortune Centre Singapore 188979. The address is a virtual office and they do not handle P+ Capital Pte Ltd.
We went furniture shopping for our new house in March and being the excited couple we were, shopping for our first house. Overpaid for our deposit and the furniture shop refused to refund us the overcharged amount. Having lost confidence, we requested for cancellation and refund same day. 8 months down the road, the overcharged amount and the refund money has not been refunded and when we visited the shop today, they push everything to their office.
They misrepresented themselves of another brand of furniture, saying that they are the manufacturer for that brand.
Overcharged us for deposit (charged us $5000 instead of $1820)
Asked us to fill up refund form and became uncontactable
We submitted for mediation via CASE, but no response
Submitted to Small Claims Tribunal (SCT) and received a ORDER OF TRIBUNAL (1) The Respondent(s) do pay the Claimant(s) the sum of $5,000.00 plues $15.50 as disbursements [TOTAL: $5,015.50] by 10 December 2020, failing which the Claimant(s) may enforce the Order accordingly. Date: 11 November 2020
The company has no office telephone number, actually they do not have an office.
The mobile number given Ben 92715597 has blocked our number and unable to call them. The other lady at the shop we are also unable to speak to 98737277. Everytime we go by, they just say they cannot help and to ask the office.
For purpose of authenticity: Police Report Number: L/20200331/2033 31/03/2020 12:03 Small Claims Tribunal Claim No.: SCT/16041/2020 Small Claims Tribunal Order No.: SCT/ORD/35258/2020
Short sequence of events -We were looking for teak, and they misrepresented themselves saying that they are the manufacturer for a few known brands such as Soul & Tables, brandishing a version of Soul & Tables catalogue with detailed explanation.
-They did not take detailed notes of our customized furniture dimensions and requirements. No sign-off on the dimensions
-Than next came the overcharge and the pushing of responsibility to the office to contact us. But the office does not exist.
If anyone is able to advice us how to get further help, please let me know.
Updates 10 Jan 2021: The company’s backend name is changed to Teak & Co. starting Nov’2020, shared with me by someone. And the new Director name is LOU MEI. The current director LOU ZOU YEE has 20 other companies where she is listed, looks like they change company names very often.
I have also included a few document for reference as I have found that there are other victims.
There seems to be a huge misconception that marriage is like the end story. I beg to differ, like my favorite teachers say, we are choosing our best life teachers. The other half with the bits of ourselves we have choose to thrown away, hence opposites attract.
Our partner has the parts of ourselves we lost and we have to reclaim it with a life-long series of jousting events, marathons and wits night to reclaims the missing parts of ourselves. It can be as easy as we will it to be, or more than doubly difficult if we choose it to be. How big is our fight with God?
Child of God. He says “Let the children come to me”. Which father do not love their child. Parents and child have an unconditional love bond. We as children have no choice, but to love. And our parents just love us no matter how messy our rooms are.
Choose happiness my friends, as happiness is what God created us to have, to learn the rest of the lessons,
I couldn’t have found a better life partner who makes me willing to try and motivates me to face the quietness of my mind. (Though at times it feels like I can’t win this journey, at least not alone.)